The whole time I was watching this I was thinking, ‘I’m pretty sure Anthony Hopkins is in this but I guess not…’ Then they show him talking for a half a second and I laughed really hard. I think that’s why this preview is better then the movie. Oh and you only have to watch Colin Farrell as Alexander the Great for like a minute and a half instead of 2 hours. Val Kilmer.

Nicolas Cage bullet dodge at 1:43 seconds, he makes Keanu Reeves look like a hack. Also, watching this preview makes sitting through the movie pointless because I guess at the end Nick Cage ‘makes a mistake’ and then the world blows up.  

NEXT! LOL

Holy shit. I was so excited to see this movie. What a badass concept. Surrounded by unspeakable beasts in the thick forests. A gentle understanding between them to keep peace by staying away. So mysterious, such tension, just glancing at the woods would be shiver inducing. What do they look like? Will they ever attack? 

No, no they won’t. Because if you saw the movie you’d know that it was just the villagers dressed up like monsters to keep everybody in the village. Oh, and it was really the year 2004 and the whole thing was like an experiment by the elders whose families were murdered or something.  One of the elders does say that monsters may have lived in the woods at one time, so when they send a blind girl out to get medicine (wtf?) and you hear a monster you think ‘oh awesome there are monsters!’ NOPE! Just the village retard dressed up like a monster, one of the better twists of the movie actually. 

I really wish I had just seen the preview and that’s it. The movie that I thought it was, is way better then what The Village actually is. At least there were a beautiful few months between the preview and the movie where I was asking myself, what did the villagers do to make the monsters angry? What do they look like? And, this couldn’t be better then The Sixth Sense… or could it?